Author The 701 Club with Sister Helen Holy

Sister Helen Holy of the First Southern Fried, Self-Satisfied Baptist Church is the arbiter of all that’s good and Christian in this world. When not ministering to heathens at events on dry land nationwide, she can frequently be found taking her ministry to the high seas on RSVP Cruises, where she spends most of the week on her knees “in prayer.” Be sure to follow Sister Helen Holy on Facebook at www.facebook.com/helen.holy.

The 701 Club

I am RILED up this week. Let’s get down to the prayer ministry. Kooks. That filthy holiday has passed us once again. Halloween. Where adults…

The 701 Club

I am painfully devoting all of this week’s column to our 45th President. Trump #1. I have been on my knees for that poor woman…

The 701 Club

Now, more than ever, I pray that I may bring some levity into this burdensome week. Hefner. Well, well, well. Adulterating sinner, Hugh Hefner, passed on…

The 701 Club

Suit up, Heathens. It’s time to dive into the maelstrom of current events. Starbucks. Well this is just ridiculous. Starbucks, that enterprise of overpriced java,…

The 701 Club

I have risen to the call for proclamation and offer these statements of faith. Judgment. Every time a natural disaster hits our land, people of…

The 701 Club

There had better be a uptick in people on their knees this week. It is greatly needed. Discount. Rejoice all ye $30,000 millionaires! Whole Foods,…

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