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Accusations, Awards & Announcements

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I am just sick and disgusted this week. Read and see why.

Accusations. More trouble in Washington. As I mentioned last week, it has been the goal of evangelicals everywhere to compromise Christian morality in support of Brother Trump for the end result of gaining a conservative to the Supreme Court. Now, a wrench is being thrown into the proceeds for Brother Kavanaugh. It seems that Brett, our Lord and Savior, is being accused of a “cross” examination of a young woman during college. Why, many are asking, is this allegation from so long ago still relevant? Clearly, as evidenced by the glorification of all things presidentially immoral, morality of a politician is only valid when needed to suppress the enemy, no matter the ability to prove guilt or innocence. Therefore, somewhere, Brother Al Franken is snickering.

Awards. I always know that at some point in September, I’m going to have to witness another parade of Hollywood liberalism on television. I’m talking about the Emmy Awards which were paraded across a stage on Monday night. I rarely watch television outside of ministry research of awards presentations, so I have no idea who most of these sinners are (although it is nice to see some diversity….a midget won an award!). However, two moments struck me personally. First, seeing Sister Betty White carried out to mumble a few words. (I respect a Sister who just doesn’t quit!) And second, a marriage proposal on air that was actually between a man and a woman. What a concept! Beyond that, the only other Christian thing I can say is that I got a couple of good naps in during the telecast.

Announcements. From my believe it or not ministry, I want to highlight this recent announcement. At the age of 69, Brother Richard Gere is fathering a child with a young woman of 35. This sort of tomfoolery may have worked in Old Testament times for the furtherance of a biblical narrative, but I find it just filthy today. I’m waiting on a statement from the NRA on this. After all, this news is proof of the dangers of having a loaded gun around young people!

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Sister Helen Holy of the First Southern Fried, Self-Satisfied Baptist Church is the arbiter of all that’s good and Christian in this world. When not ministering to heathens at events on dry land nationwide, she can frequently be found taking her ministry to the high seas on RSVP Cruises, where she spends most of the week on her knees “in prayer.” Be sure to follow Sister Helen Holy on Facebook at www.facebook.com/helen.holy.

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